Funny Golf Course Stories

[warbirdlover]

There was a post recently on funny stories from driving ranges but most of my stories come from golf courses...

Years ago when I lived in Hendersonville, NC, I used to play Etowah Valley whenever I could. Golf at Etowah Valley Country Club & Golf Lodge in Hendersonville, NC

When sssmokin was down visiting from Wisconsin we couldn't get on Etowah so we found a 9 hole course to play, Highland Lake golf club. It was nasty. The clubhouse was a shack similar to what you see on driving ranges. There was a Cadillac parked there. One hole had a railroad track going accross it and you had to wait for a long train numerous times a day. sssmokin wore a pair of white shorts and a white shirt.

We got paired with a guy who was not too good. He sliced one onto the Cadillac to start us off. Then there was this sharp dogleg right and sssmokin (trying to cut off the dogleg as usual) put his ball on the grass off the fairway, short of making the dogleg. The area was roped off and we assumed it was freshly seeded so sssmokin went over to pick up his ball. Suddenly he drops (like through a trap door) with only his arms and shoulders above the "grass". It was like sod "floating" over a swamp! When we got him dragged out his white "outfit" was solid brown mud! We laughed so hard we almost couldn't finish the round! Especially every time sssmokin lined up to make a shot in his new "brown outfit". Then to top it off we had to wait for the "train" to cross the next fairway. He slowly "dried off" enough where the mud turned to dirt and could be brushed off.

[warbirdlover]

Well maybe it wasn't as funny as I thought...

[Sandy]

Well, it raised a smile with me!

Unfortunately, after this afternoon's trip to GolfGalaxy I'm half tempted to start the third and final installment of this trilogy - 'Funny Golf Shop Stories - but I'm not sure the kid in the simulator hitting 19* hybrids merits it. Young college-age kid, he was REALLY talking his game up to the assistant, how far he hit driver, no problems with a slice, etc. Went into the simulator with two or three options, and spent the next 10 minutes topping every single shot (mostly off a driver-height tee) around 100yds down the computer-generated range.

And you know what? Rather than be embarrassed, he went back and re-hit a couple (still topping them down into the simulator) and then bought one of them!!! A new TM Burner hybrid.

You don't think he's actually that good he really was LOOKING for a club he could top 100yds to add to his shotmaking arsenal???

[JEFF4i]

Hmmm. I used to live out in the bounies, so I could hit balls across our property, as we owned two pieces. Between them was a road, and a guardrail from a stream. Well, I hear a car coming so I quickly hit the ball, top it, it flies into the guard rail, flies back up, and shatters both pains in our sunroom.

Out on the course I once was hitting the ball not too well, decided to hit another, which my dad graciously teed up for me. Well, I finally make a solid swing, hit it dead center of the club, and POOF! Powder ball.

[jcostello88]

Some good stories here!

A year or so back while I was still a junior golfer, I was playing in a regular strokeplay comp on a lovely summer's morning around August. A few of the 3balls out before me in the draw were comprised of the lowest players in the club, and the section 'hotshot' (every club has at least one or two - the guy/girl who gives the unwarranted 'tips' to you during a round) proceeded to snap hook 2 balls deep into the dense woodland. His third ball; he shanked a 2 iron at the gallery of bemused juniors, so he furously left the tee, grabbed his bag and trudged back into the clubhouse!

[JEFF4i]

That reminds me of one of my tournaments when I was a junior. This guy was talking about how well he had been doing lately, and I had known him for a while, real ****y guy.

We tee up, last group off on last day, he hits it, flies forward and low, hits the ladies tee markers, flies back, hits a bench, and then flies off into some gravel that normally would be for decoration. I bit my lip so hard not to laugh, but I still cracked a smile.

[bames]

Let me preface this by saying that this happened when I was young and had seen Caddyshack too many times. I worked at the course and was probably too much of a screw-off to do so...

My dad built a golf course in North Dakota. We were working to become "prestigious" and held a governors cup with the governor of ND with us. I was the second to last group and had spent many hours on the course and knew every hill and "jump" on it. One especially sweet "jump" was down a long downhill par 3. I threw the ol' cart in neutral and blew past the cart in front of me laughing all the way. I decided to pull a "cookie" and hammered the brakes while cranking the wheel to left. Turns out the wheel caught on a clump of grass sticking out on the cart path and it sent me rolling, popping the window out of the cart and throwing my clubs all over the 17th. It rolled right over the top of me only cutting my ankle and leaving a little gravel stuck in my elbows. I had to finish out the round and pulled up to the clubhouse hanging out of the side with a dusty cart while hauling my windshield on the back with the top smashed down to the seat. My father, the Gov, and the rest of the field were standing around eating watching as the final groups rolled in. What a site to behold.

[warbirdlover]

For a minute I thought you did something hideous to the governor!!

[mont86]

WBL that is a good story. Blames I would like to seen you roll the cart, its hard not to act smart when driving a cart.

[sssmokin]

I've got a couple that aren't too bad. This first one happened this past Sunday on the first day out in Wisconsin. On the second hole on the back nine is a tight driving hole with elevated tee and heavy woods on the left, branches hanging out, etc. and heavy woods on the right...........right at the tee. When you get past this, it opens up nicely. Well, I hit my tee shot well but pulled it left and we didn't see it but just heard a loud whack..........followed maybe 5 seconds later by a whack on the right side of the tee.........followed maybe 3 seconds later by the ball dropping right back on the tee in front of me. We were laughing so hard that the 2nd shot was tough to produce.

I'll get to the other story later on.

[sssmokin]

Okay...............here's another "cart" one. A friend of ours who played bass guitar in a local popular band, decided to take up golf with his wife as something they could do together. You know how that usually turns out.............well, Jerry likes to pound the drinks down, and we were behind him and his wife, Terri. They hit their shots on a par 3 over a large pond with fountain etc. and he was short of the green. He had quite a few under the belt, and decided that he'd take a short cut and since the cart was fiberglass that it should float...........so drove right into the pond, as we all watched, open mouthed in amazement. The only thing you could see sticking out of the pond, after they "came ashore" was the tops of the clubs. Needless to say, he was banned from the course for several years, after paying for the restoration of the cart. I have to add that he stuck to golf, and plays fairly well now. We've never let him forget it though...........LOL.

[mont86]

Originally Posted by sssmokin

Okay...............here's another "cart" one. A friend of ours who played bass guitar in a local popular band, decided to take up golf with his wife as something they could do together. You know how that usually turns out.............well, Jerry likes to pound the drinks down, and we were behind him and his wife, Terri. They hit their shots on a par 3 over a large pond with fountain etc. and he was short of the green. He had quite a few under the belt, and decided that he'd take a short cut and since the cart was fiberglass that it should float...........so drove right into the pond, as we all watched, open mouthed in amazement. The only thing you could see sticking out of the pond, after they "came ashore" was the tops of the clubs. Needless to say, he was banned from the course for several years, after paying for the restoration of the cart. I have to add that he stuck to golf, and plays fairly well now. We've never let him forget it though...........LOL.

Thats great, I would pay to see that one.

[footballking732]

Originally Posted by sssmokin

Okay...............here's another "cart" one. A friend of ours who played bass guitar in a local popular band, decided to take up golf with his wife as something they could do together. You know how that usually turns out.............well, Jerry likes to pound the drinks down, and we were behind him and his wife, Terri. They hit their shots on a par 3 over a large pond with fountain etc. and he was short of the green. He had quite a few under the belt, and decided that he'd take a short cut and since the cart was fiberglass that it should float...........so drove right into the pond, as we all watched, open mouthed in amazement. The only thing you could see sticking out of the pond, after they "came ashore" was the tops of the clubs. Needless to say, he was banned from the course for several years, after paying for the restoration of the cart. I have to add that he stuck to golf, and plays fairly well now. We've never let him forget it though...........LOL.

haha... i read that 3 minutes ago and im still laughing... soo funny..

[warbirdlover]

Was at a outing on this course where the carts are about 40 years old and bald tires, barely run etc. There was a huge thunderstorm and we were called off the course. Lot's of lightning and buckets of rain but only lasted about a 1/2 hour. Then we went back out. While we were going side by side with another pair down a hill we looked and they were still along side us going the same speed but were slowly rotating around and around like a tilt-a-whirl. They were helpless so down the hill we went like that. George (the guy who invited me and who was in the cart) couldn't drive the cart he was laughing so hard. The two guys in that cart looked like they were going to vomit from spinning so much. It was classic! (And that course STILL has those same carts!!).....

[ualtim]

Well, if Rock can re-cycle his range story, I am going to re-cycle my course story. Enjoy!


"I must say, that this was a first for me. If nothing else, hopefully you will learn the evils of a ball pushed off to the right.

Today I was playing the sixth hole at a local course today and came away from the experience a bit humbled. The sixth is a par 5 that is reachable in two if you go down the right side, but you have to be careful of a scattered patch of pine trees and OB a little further right. My driver swing was a bit off today and I was not achieving the consistency that I normally enjoy so every swing was a bit of an adventure to see if the ball would draw or fade. I teed it up on the right side of the tee box, took my practice swing, and went into my pre shot routine. I put a good swing on the ball, but it started to fade a bit to the right flirting with the pine trees and OB.

There were some smaller trees just off to the right of the tee box and fearing losing sight of the ball I started walking backwards to see where the ball was going to land. Just as I backed into the clear, I find myself in mid air and heading towards horizontal. While it only took a few quick seconds to complete the maneuver, it seemed like an eternity as my mind raced. WTF is happening to me? Why am I falling over? What the hell is that weird feeling on my right leg? Just before impact, it hits me like a ton of bricks. Tee marker! Impact. Man its cloudy today, it looks like its going to rain.

My golfing buddy runs over to see if I am OK before he starts busting out laughing. I had backed myself into the left tee marker, and to make matters worse it had one of those plastic containers on top of it that holds broken tees which is what I had slipped on. Luckily, the tee marker had two spikes in it and one ended up on either side of my ankle rather than through it.

Quite humorous if you ask me. I would have not been able to contain my laughter had it been one of the other two that did it rather than I. Worst part of the whole ordeal was the fact that no one saw where my ball landed in the rough. Obviously, I lost sight of it as I hurled towards the ground and both of the guys I was playing with were watching me fall to the ground rather than the ball. Luckily, I found it in bounds (just barely) and was able to par the hole.

I always knew that hitting the ball to the right was bad, I just didn't realize I was risking injury when I did it."

ualtim