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How to tell someone you like....

Discussion in 'Hacker's Anonymous' started by limpalong, May 1, 2017.

  1. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    ... to "Put a sock in it!"

    Really enjoy the young pro/manager at our course. We suffered through a bad one for 3 years before he was ushered out the door. The new young man has been a breath of fresh air.

    I know he means well, but I'm about ready to close the door on his office and have a 'conversation' with him. He is constantly asking me what I shot that day and then comments whether it is "good enough to show improvement". "You always need to be working to shoot better scores."

    No, I don't. At 70 1/2, first of all I'm just glad to be able to tee it up. At 70 1/2 to be able to dip into the upper 70's on a fairly regular basis is waaaayyyy more than I should ever expect. At 70 1/2 to be showing an 8.6 handicap index at our course is, frankly, unbelievable.

    There are days one hip hurts or days when one knee hurts or days when both shoulders hurt or days when the back is acting up. Who cares? I'm not going to sit at home in a recliner and dwell on my aches and pains. If something hurts, I know I woke up this morning. I will play the best golf the Good Lord gives me each day. I've never had a lesson and ain't gonna take one in an attempt to shoot better scores. If something in the bag goes crosswise, I may replace it or I may not. I would much rather spend time trying to remember the latest jokes I've heard long enough to tell the group tomorrow morning than worrying about shaving strokes.

    Like I said, I've really enjoyed this young man. He has been awesome about getting acquainted and meeting all the members he can. May just let his comments slide, knowing he means well. Probably a better direction than possibly upsetting him by telling him to "Put a sock in it!"
     
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  2. azgreg

    azgreg "Don't count that." Supporting Member

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    "Excuse me son, but go fuck yourself."
     
  3. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    Sorta like that. I'd get excommunicated from the course membership and join the local Country Club. I'd be important!!!!
     
  4. Fairwaysplitter3320

    Fairwaysplitter3320 Recovering Equipment Ho...off the wagon again. Staff Member Admin

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    Admin Post
    ^^^This is the answer. Close the thread.
     
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  5. SiberianDVM

    SiberianDVM I love Hooters Moderator

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    Every time he starts talking about improving your scores, interrupt with a story about your sex life, even if you have to make it up. Be sure to describe every wrinkle, saggy tit, and cottage cheese thigh.

    Within a week, he will run away every time he sees you.
     
  6. PaPaD

    PaPaD Club ho, geezer........ Supporting Member

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    How about something along the lines of "I really appreciate your encouragement. I do. But at my stage in life, I am just thankful to be able to get out and play. I don't really like to practice and have no intent to improve. I just want to enjoy the game" If that doesn't work, tell him to go fukk himself.
     
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  7. TheTrueReview

    TheTrueReview "Playing it straight" Supporting Member

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    Say: "My wife's out tonight. How about you swing by and we'll see what comes up."

    Guaranteed to put distance between the both of you.
     
  8. azgreg

    azgreg "Don't count that." Supporting Member

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    I've done a similar thing with Jehovah's Witnesses.
     
  9. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    Don't think I'll chance this one. He's 35, single, and never married. Has a male roommate. Not assuming anything, but, today, you never know......
     
  10. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    Quick! Tell me some stories... even made up ones. Need some entertainment this afternoon!!!!!:D:D
     
  11. TheTrueReview

    TheTrueReview "Playing it straight" Supporting Member

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    I'm sure he's "Limp curious."
     
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  12. ejdahl21

    ejdahl21 Never Lay Up Supporting Member

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    "Limp" Is that his name or the effect of seeing him in the buff?
     
  13. warbirdlover

    warbirdlover Ender of all threads Supporting Member

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    On this line we had a JW come to the door and her little boy was doing the "pee-pee" dance. I offered to let him use our bathroom and she said no, he'll have to wait. I thought "okay lady, we'll see about that" and continued our deep religious conversation for a LONG time. The kid was frantic and if he didn't pee in her car I'd be real surprised. I figured if our bathroom wasn't good enough for a stranger to use he'll have to use your car. :eek::oops::poop::(
     
  14. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    Few have been so lucky as to witness the physical marvel I am by seeing me 'au natural'!!!:eek::eek:
     
  15. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    Should have told her, "If our bathroom isn't good enough, at least let him go in our front yard." If facilities are offered and she is too stubborn/dumb/stupid/set in her ways to pass it up, isn't that child abuse?
     
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  16. Libre

    Libre Well-Known Member

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    To limpalong - you asked a serious question and got very little in the way of sound advice. Telling the young man gfy, while sounding very funny here on a forum, or in an anecdote in the locker room, is actually horrible advice. You're in your 70's, you said. Haven't you run into people before, with whom you'd rather avoid certain discussions, but find they are sometimes unavoidable? This is about 75% of the people I run into. Do I tell them to g f themselves? Of course not. You owe it to your fellow man to be decent to them as long as they're not insufferable.

    So limpalong, if you want to cross a line that once crossed, there is no way back - tell him put a sock it it or just tell him you're not interested in this line of discussion, thank you. But if you want to continue to get along with this fellow - or any other person - you nod your head politely, endure their tales and advice, tell them "how interesting!" or whatever for a moment, then you excuse yourself and go about your business. I dunno, maybe give him half an ear? Sometimes, even idiots have something useful to impart.

    You figure out in life who you want to get closer to, who are fine at arms length, and who to run away from. Very important to keep these categories straight. Try to keep people that you associate with in one of the first two categories. He's the pro/manager at your course. You said you like the man. Don't alienate him to have a good locker room anecdote. You'll regret it. When he asks about your golf, because maybe he feels it's his job, or he just wants to converse with you, you can simply tell him that you're doing the best you can, as always.

    It takes patience to maintain friendships, and you have to know that your friends have to be equally patient, to maintain a relationship with you.
     
    Last edited: Dec 13, 2017
  17. azgreg

    azgreg "Don't count that." Supporting Member

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  18. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    Excellent post! Glad you found this old one and took the time to add your two cents worth. Reading through the original post and the replies, including your well thought out one, give me a chance to make a few comments as to how the year has progressed.

    1.) The young man I was shaking my head about early in his tenure has been a huge asset to our course. He has shown a maturity, integrity, and responsibility that have made our course a better place to play golf and to enjoy a segment of our social life. I only hope we can continue to support him, watch him grow in his position, and see our club continue to prosper.

    2.) Over this past year, he and I have struck up an excellent relationship. I've not agreed with everything he has done while employed by our course. Yet, I firmly believe we could not have found a better fit to rebuild what the last person in that position had torn down.

    3.) I've always believed that if you have complaints about a situation try to be part of the solution. My career the past couple decades had seen me on the road during the week. I could not run for the Board at our course since it would have been impossible to have been a responsible participant in meetings, etc. 2,000 nights in hotels the last 14 years did not lend itself to being present to be an effective Board member. I retired early in 2017. So, I tossed my hat into the ring when the nominations were open for Board positions. At the annual meeting a couple weeks ago, I was elected to a 3-year term on our Board of Directors. Now, if I do have any things that are unsettling about how the course is operated it is part of my responsibility to discuss those things with the Board and come to a resolve that benefits the Course and its members. (That also allows me to be part of negotiating the Course employees annual contracts so they better be nice to me!!! :D)

    4.) Lastly, the comments about telling the young man... telling anyone... to gfy is not my way of handling issues. Working in a very high stress career where I could be referred to in terms on a daily basis that included numerous 4-letter words, I found it solved nothing to lower myself to that level. In fact, I told contractors I worked with if they ever heard me utter a four-letter word on a job site I would hand them a $100 bill. No one was ever able to collect it. In stressful arguments when a person's patience is being tried, to stoop to name calling only escalates the situation. I learned, over the years, that patience and the ability to deescalate trumped a nose-to-nose confrontation. I worked through my issues with the subject young man by almost immediately bestowing pats on the back and applauding him for his efforts. Don't know how many times while biting my tongue about one issue, I told him... honestly... how blessed the Course was to have him on board. Those efforts got him to asking me for advice instead of offering me unwanted advice.

    There! If you don't know by now, my posts are short and concise. I rarely post a response that contains more than a single sentence... or two... or three... or four... or................. :D This response may have exceeded the very few words I'm used to posting, but hopefully it explains where things have evolved to since the thread was initiated.
     
  19. Libre

    Libre Well-Known Member

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    I'm glad that the situation has evolved in a positive way for you.
    I don't know if you watch Curb Your Enthusiasm but Larry David wanted to distance himself from a chatty person at his golf club and things really went from bad to worse.

    Now, tell me more about that 8.6 handicap. I'm 66 and I have no trouble shooting my age. On the front 9. Then I shoot it again on the back. Well, that's a joke, but I'm always near 50 on each side. And it takes some good playing on my part to do that. Your pro's attitude could probably benefit me. I can't seem to improve - I mean, every individual skill is better or worse from round to round but I'm always on the north side of 100 no matter what.
     
  20. PaPaD

    PaPaD Club ho, geezer........ Supporting Member

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    Limp - I think your Pro is just trying to sell you lessons! ;)
     
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