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Y'all are boring today

Discussion in 'No Golf For You!' started by eclark53520, Apr 16, 2013.

  1. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  2. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  3. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  4. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  5. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  6. azgreg

    azgreg "Don't count that." Supporting Member

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  7. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  8. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    A doctor had a good reputation of helping couples increase the joy in their sex life, but always promised not to take a case if he felt he couldn't help. The Browns came into see the successful doctor and he gave them thorough physical exams, psychological exams, and various tests. Finally, he concluded, "Yes, I am happy to say that I can help you." "On your way home from my office stop at the grocery store and buy some grapes and doughnuts. Go home, take off your clothes, and you, sir, roll the grapes across the floor until you make a bulls eye in your wife's love canal. Then on hands and knees you must crawl to her like a leopard and retrieve the grape using only your tongue. "Then next, ma'am, you must take the doughnuts and from across the room, toss them at your husband until you make a ringer around his love pole. Then like a lioness, you must crawl to him and consume the doughnut." The couple went home and their sex life became more and more wonderful. They told their friends, Mr. & Mrs. Green that they should see the good doctor. The doctor greeted the Greens and said he would not take the case unless he felt that he could help them; so he conducted the physical exams and the same battery of tests. Then he told the Greens the bad news. "I cannot help you, so I will not take your money. I believe your sex life is as good as it will ever be, I cannot help." The Greens pleaded with him, and said, "You helped our friends the Browns, now please, please, help us." "Well, all right", the doctor said. "On your way home from the office, stop at the grocery store and buy some apples and a box of cheerios... "
     
  9. TheTrueReview

    TheTrueReview "Playing it straight" Supporting Member

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    Ian Poulter’s social media can be quite funny.
    ImageUploadedByShot Talk1580808298.346080.
     
  10. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  11. TheTrueReview

    TheTrueReview "Playing it straight" Supporting Member

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  12. TheTrueReview

    TheTrueReview "Playing it straight" Supporting Member

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  13. azgreg

    azgreg "Don't count that." Supporting Member

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    A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk.

    Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

    "Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer."

    Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"

    "Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to a Golf course. A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'why not make the best of it? So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes.'

    "Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

    "Well, you know", said the little old lady, "not everybody pays."
     
  14. TheTrueReview

    TheTrueReview "Playing it straight" Supporting Member

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  15. TheTrueReview

    TheTrueReview "Playing it straight" Supporting Member

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  16. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  17. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  18. TheTrueReview

    TheTrueReview "Playing it straight" Supporting Member

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  19. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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  20. limpalong

    limpalong Mental Ward Escapee Supporting Member

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    The beauty about having a one night stand with an Amish girl is you don't have to worry about her calling you the next day.
     

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