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Anger/Frustration/Temperment

Andy_79

Well-Known Member
Oct 6, 2005
2,199
0
How are yours ?

As I.G. could second, I have been known to throw the toys outta the pram on the course at some points during the round. 'Have' being the operative word in this sentence, I am now hoping....:)

On Saturday past I sort of let myself down - not for the first time, however - by shouting a few expleitives after horseshoing out from short range, or when getting an unfair bounce. i can recollect one of my fourball turning away from me, seemingly in digust, after letting a few ungentlemanly words out of me on the 12th green, after spinning out for a birdie '2.'
I took it upon myself to text him an apology later that day, vowing never to react that like to anything not going my way on a golf course ever again. I must try and hold my word to that from now on.

I am interested to hear how you guys deal with unsavioury kicks/bounces, or putts constantly shaving the hole during a round of golf. I have had more than one person take me aside and tell me to "catch myself on" regarding acting in this way, so am just gonna try and chill from now on out there.

I am interested to hear your take on "anger on the course...." :)
 

chollyred

Well-Known Member
Mar 9, 2006
317
0
Occaisional mild, low volume expletives don't bother me too much because I sympathize with the frustration. Screaming obscenities, throwing clubs, constant expletives on every hole really put me off.

I grew up with the notion that golf was a gentleman's game and that I should conduct myself in that manner. Whie playing with a bunch of guys, I may let my manners slip a little, but in most cases would expect my manners to stand up as if I were playing with a group of ladies.

I'm not a good enough golfer to get upset over every bad shot that occurs. I'd spend my entire round beating myself or my equipment up. While I take the game seriously, it is still a game to me. Even if I hit bad shots, or get a bad bounce, I still enjoy being out on the course with good company.
 

warbirdlover

Ender of all threads
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Jul 9, 2005
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I usually swear "in a normal voice" when that occurs and just go on. When I let it smolder I'm in trouble scorewise.
 
OP
Andy_79

Andy_79

Well-Known Member
Oct 6, 2005
2,199
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  • Thread Starter
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I think that is a very good view to have upon the matter.

I also threw my putter at my bag on the 15th on Saturday after leaving my putt in the jaws of the hole. Haven't done that in ages. I did, however, apologise into myself to my putter the next day after I holed a good putt & lovingly tapped it on its head. I don't want to fall out my my baby, after all.....! :)
 

DouginGA

dont tread on me
Dec 8, 2005
913
0
Swearing is no problem by me, if in a reasonable voice, but screaming anything (good or bad) is out of line in my book. Others dont want to hear you. Throwing clubs is a no no and any damaging action to the course (thumping the putter into the green, kicking the cart,etc) is just plain immature.

Golf is a mental game. If you can't control your emotions your game is going to suffer. Disappointment is only normal, taking it in stride and being able to move on is not only proper ettiquette but will make you a better scorer as well as golfer.
 

OmegaG5

Well-Known Member
Jul 29, 2006
106
0
I only just started playing golf last Easter, at the age of 62. I did that for relaxation, anti-stress, and the exercise. The bonus was that I would get to meet new friends. I have had more than my share of "stupid shots", and plenty of those that were "nearly but didn't" shots. I have seen lots of other people become angry, and throw their toys out of the cot. The Pro at my course mends around 5 or 6 shafts a week.

But hang on... why am I here? (See above). Putting it simply, I refuse to let a bad shot (OK, several), in a round upset my day. Or upset my moment in my day.

Last week I played a threesome round with a father and his 14 year old son. His son was pretty good! He plays in his school team and in the Juniors at the club. He hit a few bad ones and let it show. My advice to him was to "Be Cool", and gain the respect of his peers by "Acting cool".

There's nothing wrong with showing disappointment in a bad shot, but there's everything to gain by handling it well, especially in front of others. Golf mirrors real life. We get things wrong. Its how we handle them, and recover, that is important. Out on the golf course there is a great opportunity to practice how we handle getting things wrong, because they go wrong several times in a day! Just as in real life, you can't take it back when the ball has left the club. Its been done. Its simply a learning experience. From that moment, you just have to figure out how to recover. Gracefully. Otherwise, it will become a habit to throw a tantrum. You have all seen people do it.

Question 1. What is your impression of them, especially if they do it often?
Question 2. How do you want other people to see you?

Your call.

R.
 

ezra76

Well-Known Member
Feb 5, 2006
12,412
16
I talk to the ball but it never helps. The most you'll hear out of me is calling my driver a dirty ho in a low grumble or jamming an iron back into my bag. I don't play in any competitions or anything, just hack around. When I play with better players at a nicer course I rarely say anything. My attidtude has gotten a lot better this year. I now accept the fact that a 11-12 cap is going to hit 25-30% of shots poorly. I trust that after 2 bad shots I am due for a really good one.
 

Rockford35

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Aug 30, 2004
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This is a great thread.

I try and have as much fun on the course. Sure, I get frustrated, and say some unkind words from time to time, but normally I talk to my ball like it's my little brother.

However, as the round goes on, it gets worse as my score rises.

"You bastard. Now why - WHY - would you hop into the rough like that when all that fairway is just inches away? C'mon now, let's get real."

"You stupid freaking jerk. Why the fark would you lip out like that? It breaks more than that! Jeepers"

"Get left Mother*&&*$^&*!!!!"

"You %@*&^%# piece of $*^*&& *&%^^^# ball! I should *&%^&^ you in the *&&%&# and then take your mother out for a nice seafood dinner and never #&^@^%^* call her again."

"I'll be in the car. Cripes."

:D

R35

PS...I'm actually pretty good on the course. I threw a club once. Only once. It ended up 40 foot up in a tree and took me 45 minutes to get it down. Lovely.

PSS....did I mention that I was trying to hit a draw 3 iron out of a fairway bunker to a green 225 away? Ya, super smart. Buried it right in the face. Hence the toss. And it's never the clubs fault. Never.
 

IrishGolfer

Fac ut gaudeam
Supporting Member
Sep 1, 2004
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I think some sort of fine or forfeit paid to your playing partners would be a good start. ie a Swear Box with £1 for striaght Fxxxs, £5 for screaming obscenities and £10 for club throwing or equipment bashing. That way we can all buy a drink afterwards by way of compenssation. Or maybe even a steak dinner and cigar if it is a colourful day.

I'll get my lawyers onto it after they have finished with my claim against Token Hotie goes to court. That shot she hit me in the leg with means I'll never dance again!

Only kidding, this is a good first step. I found myself getting a bit frustrated on Saturday as well, especially on 11, 17 and 18. I try and look at it differently these days. Sure I want to play the best I can, but I also go home to my wife and kids afterwards.
 

twogreen

Well-Known Member
Aug 7, 2006
492
54
Since I didn't have any great expectations when I started the game two years ago at age 67, my anger management hasn't been a problem. I guess that I just accepted the fact that bad shots would be the norm rather than the exception.

Recently, though, as my game has started to improve, I find myself frequently feeling more frustration when I blow a shot that I know I should have made. Generally speaking, it happens most often when I leave a putt short. I don't make an outward show of it; but, internally, I just want to kick my own arse.
 

DaveE

The golfer fka ST Champ
Aug 31, 2004
3,986
3
There are always a few swear words during a round but not loud. Doesn't matter what you're saying, you should keep the volume to respectable level for other people on the course.

I think it's ok to be disapointed with a bad shot but it's very important to let it go and move on. I use let a few bad shots destroy a round but I almost never let that happen now. With as many bad shots as I hit I'd have to quit the game it I couldn't deal with disapointment.

None of the guys in my group are club throwers but one will say goodbye to a ball if it acts up too often. He doesn't hit it at anybody, just gives it a toss into a hazard or the rough.

When all else fails there's beer.
 

IrishGolfer

Fac ut gaudeam
Supporting Member
Sep 1, 2004
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Folks

I can add a bit more here. Andy is truly a great player, real quality, playing off a 2 index on a very difficult course, usually under trying conditions. He has the ability to shoot the lights out with very few weaknesses in his game. He's also a good guy, funny, genuine.

But he also has very high expectations of himself and gets very frustrated very quickly. Turning into Mr. Angry not only brings him down a level, but also everyone that is in his company.

Everyone, even Tiger hits bad shots. While there is nothing wrong with high expectations, it is the ability to be realistic, deal with the poor shots by letting them go and getting over them. Moving onto the most important thing, which is the next shot. And keeping a positive attitude is key to that.

I can't make every putt
I can't hit every fairway
I can hit chip shots fat
I will select the wrong club occasionally

but I love this game, and I see it as a challenge to put each mistake behind me quickly and to enjoy just being out there each day on the links.
 

Bravo

Well-Known Member
Aug 27, 2004
5,822
15
Well I usually am very calm on the course when bad fortune occurs but I gotta say last weekend, I got more pissed off than I have in years. While I didn't throw any clubs (they are too damned expensive to replace) I really let out some loaded four letters after one particular situation really got to me.

We were playing our annual Mouthwedge Open. Four rounds of golf using a Stableford system. $150 to enter and since we have eight players - there is a $1200 pot. We have a Ryder Cup competition going on concurrently with the stableford.

1) The overall 4 day Stableford winner gets $250...second place is $150.

2) Each day, the player who is most over quota on their stableford for that day gets $100...second gets $50.

3) The winning Ryder Cup team gets $50 per player - which of course is not decided until the final day. We play Singles matches as well as Fourball. No foursomes.

We play full Rules of Golf in this tourney.

So we tee off on the second day on the RTJ Links course in Auburn/Opelika. They have done a really shitty job of maintaining the fairways. They've been scalped tight and heavily watered. Muddy balls are very common especially if you hit high drives. Often the ball will bounce and take one short hop and sit there covered in mud. So I am hitting one muddy ball after another.

On a long Par 5, I hit a perfect drive and a perfect 7 iron to put myself right at 100 yards for my approach. 100 yards is my Cleveland 54 wedge distance. I go up to the ball and it is lying in a pile of mud surrounding the sprinkler head. I hit my normal iron swing with the descending blow and the ball goes about 50 yards. Bogey when I could have had an easy par or potentially a birdie.

OK - shake it off.

Play two more holes and have another Par 5. Steep, steep uphill dogleg right to left about 480...reachable with two good blows. Heavy bog/marsh running the entire length of the hole from tee to green along the left side. Anything and everything hit in there is just gone. Don't try to look...just reload and strike another from where you hit your last.

So I bust a nice straight drive 270. Play it safe and hit it straight...don't flirt with the left side.

I've got about 220 to a back pin location. Once again uphill pretty steep and dogleg right to left. Gotta carry this heavy marsh. If I hit it in there, it's death/reload.

My five wood is good for 220-225 and my natural shot shape is right to left...so I decide to get aggressive on this.

I pure my Sonartec 19 and it is flying right over the marsh...I see the ball hit and bounce left but it still looks pretty good. My playing partner was 100 yards up the fairway and said the same thing...think you flew it and it bounced toward the green.

I go up there and don't see it and immediately spend my time looking in the front 2-3 feet of the marsh, hoping it maybe trickled in and I could get a hack on it.

Cannot find it. Since the marsh is a red staked lateral, I take a stroke penalty and drop a ball. Hit on the front of a three level green and take a seven.

I start walking back to my cart...and there is my original ball, lying one foot off the fairway, only 20 yards short of the green.

Since we are playing strict ROG, and I declared by original ball lost - I am toast. Instead of having an easy par and a really decent chance at birde with a decent chip - I get effing nothing. No points....screwed again.

I just burst out I was so frustrated. Another hole where i was just striking the ball so beautifully and I got effed again...

At the end of the round, I finished -5 on my Stableford quota. The winner finished -3 and second was -4. This cost me somewhere between $50-$100 and I am not a happy camper.

With so much money on the line, when this kind of shit happens to me - it really gets my goat.
 

WMitch6

Well-Known Member
Jul 24, 2006
483
18
I used to play "angry" golf. Pissed whenever my round didn't meet my expectations. I have been known to throw a few clubs and not even bother to retrieve them.
One day, I don't know why, I came to the realization that I wasn't enjoying the game so I quit. It took two years to get back to playing, this time with a whole new outlook. I decided to play for the enjoyment of the game, the comraderie of a friendly competition and the memory of the occasional great shot. I refuse to get angry over a bad shot or a missed putt. Instead I try to figure out why I hit it so poorly. It distracts me from getting angry.
While I often don't keep score and seldom turn in a card, my game is probably where it was when I was the most competitive.
I still have "anger" problems on the course, but they are no longer associated with how I'm playing. Now I'm working on accepting the slow a**h*les in front and the jerks hitting into us from behind.
 

Pa Jayhawk

Well-Known Member
Nov 15, 2005
7,126
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United States United States
I played with a guy last week that missed a putt, and threw his putter very poorly I might add. It ended up in the woods. We spent five minutes looking for his putter. I told him it had to be the only putter in the woods, how hard can it be to find. Last year there was a putter up in a tree off in front of a green, it was there for 6 months before it disappeared. I have only thrown a club once in my life and it was because it slipped out of my hand.

Although anytime I 4 putt, I throw the ball in the woods or water, or anywhere close by. My wife once told me not to get upset, I responded that I was not upset but the ball is cursed at that point and deserves to be lost and that it was either the ball or the Putter.
 

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