• Welcome To ShotTalk.com!

    We are one of the oldest and largest Golf forums on the internet with golfers from around the world sharing tips, photos and planning golf outings.

    Registering is free and easy! Hope to see you on the forums soon!

Another Funny Email I got

Davebud

Crackhead Zebra
Oct 31, 2005
1,723
0
Broke back Bar

A cowboy (Greg by name) walks into a bar and two steps in he realizes it's a gay bar.
"What the heck," he says to himself, "I really want a drink." When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy, "What's the name of your willy?"


The cowboy says, "Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a
drink." The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell
me the name of your willy. Mine for instance is called NIKE, for the
slogan 'Just Do It.' That guy down at the end of the bar calls his SNICKERS,
because 'It really Satisfies."


The cowboy looks dumbfounded, so the bartender tells him he will give
him a second to think it over. So the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left who is sipping on a beer, "Hey bud, what's the name of yours?" The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX." The thirsty cowboy asks, "Why Timex?" The fella proudly replies, " 'Cause it takes a lickin'! and keeps on tickin!'"


A little shaken, the cowboy turns to two fella's on his right, who
happen to be sharing a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you guys call
yours?" The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because
"'Quality is Job One" Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford lately?"
The guy next to him then says, "I call mine CHEVY.....'Like a Rock!'
And gives a wink!



Even more shaken, the Cowboy has to think for a moment before he comes
up with a name for his manhood. Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my willy is SECRET. Now give me a beer." The bartender begins to pour the cowboy a beer, but with a puzzled look asks, "Why Secret?"


The cowboy says, "Because it's 'STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!!!!

 

warbirdlover

Ender of all threads
Supporting Member
Jul 9, 2005
19,151
5,601
central Wisconsin
Country
United States United States
Okay, did you hear about the big pro football lineman who walked in a gay bar by mistake?

This little guy comes swishing up to him and says (in a high feminine, squeaky voice) "I know you. You're that big, strong pro football player we see on TV". "I know you can play that football but I bet you've never played baaaaaaaarrrrrrr (musically) football".

The football player replies (very low, loud gruff voice) "BAR FOOTBALL!! WHAT THE HELL IS BAR FOOTBALL?"

The little guy says (remember the high voice) "well here I'll show you. Bartender give me a beer". The bartender gives him a beer and the little guy chugs it down, slams it down on the bar and says "touchdown, six points". Then he drops his drawers, bends over, and let's a squeaky little gay fart. He says "extra points good, I'm ahead seven to nothing".

The big football player says "HELL, I CAN DO THAT"...."BARTENDER GIVE ME A BEER" and he chugs it down slams it on the bar breaking the glass and says "TOUCHDOWN, SIX POINTS" and drops his drawers and bends over for the extra point.

The little gay guy (pants still down) goes running up behind him, hands waving in the air screaming "block that kick" "block that kick" :D

Oh well.... :D
 

JEFF4i

She lives!
Supporting Member
Jul 3, 2006
13,545
95
Nice one Warbird. The first one I had heard a while ago, still good.
 

Sandpiper3

Golf Course Designer
Aug 9, 2006
5,058
2
Wow... these are just disturbing jokes.... Remind me not to read this thread again...
 

limpalong

Mental Ward Escapee
Supporting Member
Oct 18, 2006
13,821
13,653
I forgot!
Country
United States United States
Okay, who started this mess!!!!

Little Johnny was over 2 hours late coming home from school. His parents were really worried and were pacing the floor. Finally, Johnny arrives at home. His parents are waiting just inside the door and begin giving him a stern lecture. "We were worried sick!" "Where in the world have you been?"

Johnny sheepishly replies, "I've been involved in a love affair with one of my school teachers." "We've been having sex the past couple of hours!"

Johnny's mother lets out an anguished cry as she goes running from the room. Johnny's father, assuming Mother is still listening, says "Johnny, I'm ashamed of you!" "You should know better!" "I just can't believe you got involved in this!" Johnny hung his head in shame and embarrassment.

Once, Johnny's father felt comfortable that Mother was up stairs and out of hearing distance, he told Johnny "Even though it was wrong, I'm proud of you!" "Do you realize I was in college before I experienced sex with one of my teachers, and you're only in the 6th grade!" "Tell you what, grab your coat. I'm taking you down to the bicycle shop and you can pick out a brand new bike!" "What do you think about that!"

Johnny replied, "Dad, could I have a raincheck on that bike?" "After the afternoon with Mr. Smith, my butt's still a little sore!"
 

🔥 Latest posts

Top