ShotTalk International Open - September 12 2005

[IrishGolfer]

Game on Dudes!

The forecast looks good, the venue is awesome, "the playas" are now assembling for the next encounter in this extraordinary Shottalk event. Coming off the last leg in Portstewart in May this time the tour moves on to the beautiful pastures of Kells in Co. Meath. Headford boasts two stunning parkland courses offering a stern but fair challenge. A lot of water has gone under the bridge since Portstewart.

Playa Profiles

Bagger Dave - index 5
Coming off his POTY and fessing up to winning just about everything going this year (see his pic pf silver and glassware), Dave still insists that he needs a few extra shots out there! Despite shooting an eccletic gross 63 over 2 rounds, the quietly spoken Leinsterman just can't see his problem; yet we can see the evidence right here in front of us. And remember this is the dude that "Aced us" the last time we were out in May. His main dilemma will be pimping his wardrobe, those disco pants of May need to move up a gear! Remember we are now in his 'hood, so expect a strong showing from the Man from the Lakes!

Kilted Arab - index 12
Flew back to Scotland last week so should be well rested with no "jet-lagged" excuses. This Tax Exile has been showing subtle recent signs of Far Right Thatcherism, which potentially could affect his golf on Monday (especially if the locals get wind of this! And remember he is the self-styled guardian of the Hacker's Forum, so he needs to watch that he doesn't actually play well or he may have to ban himself!!! However KA is firmly down as the bookies "inside the ropes" Long Shot. I'll bet he has been quietly out honing his 100 yard chips before jetting into Ireland on Sunday well rested and suntanned. As long as he doesn't wear that bloody awful hat he wore the last time.

Irish Golfer - index 5
The current Shottalk reigning champion, "Lunch Hander Extraordinaire" this remarkable young man has had his problems this season - he is only just coming out of a bad run of form with a good showing last week-end. Expect him to show up like a Pimp on Acid this Monday, with thoughts of outdoing the Disco experience of last time. He has had his bladder in training for the past 8 weeks, reinforcing his urethra muscles commando style to be tougher than a Drill Sergeant Major; he has now gone without a piss for 4 days and is carrying an extra 3 stone on urine. He will be on dried crackers and no fluids at lunchtime. Remember also that he has a 3 hour drive (4.30am kick-off) to Kells and has never got out of a car cold and shot a good round in his life. Expect a stronger showing in the afternoon however.

????
Still room for another to pitch up. GolfMonkey? Teh Master? (Can you not ditch skool for a day?)

OK so the format?

36 holes stableford for the Shottalk (International) Trophy Thong. (I predict a winning total of 70 points!)
am and pm Skins - loser buys lunch / dinner (Kilted - bring your Gold card mate!)
Various formats including Best Dressed Golfa, best shot of the day, worst shot of the day

Digital cameras will be on hand to capture every moment for ShotTalkers round the globe. I can't wait...

 

[Dave Ireland]

LOL.... aye yer a funny one alright , how comes myself and KA have lost shots from the last time, even tho ya beat our sorry arses ..I'll give ya a decent replay later

 

[Jay McNasty]

LOL..This is gonna rock. Looking forward to the pics.

 

[DaveE]

LMAO......IG. Great report, wish we would have video and sound man at this one.

 

[IrishGolfer]

Well what can I say? One word would sum up yesterday. Fantastic Fun. (Well tha's two words actually, but I'm sure you get my drift!)

Despite a misty start, when the sun finally burned through, the rest of the day was magnificent, with blue skies, a light breeze, 22 degrees Celsius, perfect. The venue was nothing short of magnificent, 36 holes of parkland delight. I would rate this as one of the best 36 hole combos in Ireland. A snip at €80.

So to the day. We played the Old Course in the morning, teeing off at 8.30am in a becalmed mist. The course is a shortish, tree-lined affair, with lots of good holes, requiring shaped tee shots, accurate irons etc. We had our fair-share of "pin ball wizards" but at least there was only one ball lost. I also found out that I was an uncle yesterday as news filtered through that my sis-in-law had a baby girl, Molly, so I had to take and send a lot of calls, most of which were during KA's backswing. (sorry lads!!).

After a great lunch (sponsored by Dave's employer) we then took on the might of the New Course in the afternoon. This was a different story altogether. Lots of water, carries off the tee, island greens etc. And with the heat of the day, the long walks between tees and greens, lack of fluid and the fact we already had 18 holes under our belt, the stamina was sorely lacking. It was survival and the scores suffered. Three very tired dudes walked off the 18th green and made the walk up towards the clubhouse in relative silence.

We rounded the day off with a great meal (again sponsored by Dave!), several good stories and a handshake to "do it again soon".

I had the unenviable task of driving home last night to a "war torn" Belfast in the midst of riots. There were a lot of closed roads, but I managed eventually to pick my way through a route to my parents where I stayed the night. Things have quietened down overnight and I'm sure KA will make it to the airport alright today. Bloody Northern Ireland, it's politics and it's riots!

The lads will chip in with their stories and pictures of the day (I didn't have the camera with me - my sister in law had a baby. If I had taken the camera with me golfing I would be now single, enough said!!). But it was great seeing Dave and KA again. Dave didn't disappoint with his wardrobe, but I think I can lay claim to outpimping him! Especially in the afternoon.

Dave's game showed a lot of strengths, especially his iron play, but he was a bit off on the day with his driver and putta and as the day went on I guess he lost some interest. At one point he even attempted a Runner (taking a three step run up to the ball and whoosh) to inject some interest.

The Kilted One showed a lot of skill round the green with some deft touches, but his Tee work let him down, too many slices. He has now banned me from the Hacker's part of the Forum.

Oh, and I nearly forget. The winning total, as predicted was 70 stableford points! Modesty prevents me from going into further detail, but let's just say IG is still the undisputed ST champion and that lunch was appropriately handed out.

Once again a great day made possible through this Forum. So well done Sling, see what you have created. Friendship through golf.

 

[Golf Monkey]

Sorry I missed it, had the car packed and was ready to head up on Saturday lunchtime but heard the news and decided not to run the gauntlet!.

Hope Kilted got to the airport ok he had to pass one of the worst spots.

I'll never be able to understand this country, it's their own areas they're vandalising ....Morons.

 

[Dave Ireland]

Wow .... yeah whatta day. IG's report speaks volumes for the 2 courses, very contrasting outlays. Da man totally outplayed us - swept around the Old Course in a majestic 75 for 38 points, the ifs, whats and maybes should well have seen him under the card and 70 wouldn't have been an unrealsitic score.

Being the consumate professional he had a change of outfit for his attack on the New Course - a shirt that Duffy Waldorf would've thought twice about wearing and he eased to victory pullling up.

Btw, don't ever humor Kilted again if he posts a thread about his chip yips, the guy is an absolute genius around the greens. His dress sense however was rather puritanical - definete room for improvement.

 

[DaveE]

Sounds like a great time, except for drive home for IG. Now I'm wishing we could've pulled off the outing next month.

Sorry to hear about what's going on in your country IG. But don't feel alone, the world's full of idiots. Here, they destroy cities to celebrate sports championships.

 

[Bravo]

Let's see some pix!! And we want narrative!!

Who will supply??

 

[Kilted Arab]

Let's see some pix!! And we want narrative!!

Who will supply??

Great posts, IG! And well done on keeping it in yer breeks!

I may not be online properly again for another 10 days or so, travelling about...then i'll get some pics up.

Thanks, Irishes, for a superb day! Much appreciated!

KA

 

[Dave Ireland]

The Pimpmeister v Kilted Arab

Well the pimpmeister aka Irishgolfer after taking a severe beating in the sartorial elegance stakes on his home course in May by yours truly, came out fighting on the New Course Headfort last Monday. He donned this ensemble scored from the wardrobe set of Magnum PI in a job lot on eBay. Kilted was asked to pose in the pic to give greater definition to IG's vibrancy....

 

[Dave Ireland]

KA on #4

This is the 4th on the New Course, around 138 yards (da goons have everything measured in metres). It's a semi island green with water front, right and back. Allowing for the clammy weather I still think we all had dry balls on this hole

 

[Dave Ireland]

Da Pimp doin what he does best

This is a quick clip of IG teeing off on the 1st in the afternoon. This is a cracking opening hole, around 380 yards dogleg left. Ideal shot was the big chestnut tree at the corner of dogleg to leave PW/9I in. To put things in context, we played the Old Course in the morning, which was a delightful parkland course, full of individual mature oak trees with wide fairways and very little trouble (only 1 lost ball in the 3ball for the morning, and he wasn't Irish ) If you then factor in a nice light lunch washed down with a few pint glasses, the fairway surrounded by the tall trees looked as tight as a mouses ear, anyway himself stood up and boomed a lovely drive 280 or so.

 

[Dave Ireland]

KA on #1

The previous preamble about tight fairways, copious beer still holds for this clip of Kilted. Myself and KA knew the game was very near up after the 1st 18, and we knew we needed to make a fast start. This one started fast towards the trees and didn't come back .... just like the ex-girlfriend ..no Kilted it wasn't a sheep

You can hear IG's words of comfort to KA ..."that's alright" then a slight pause, *bollox I've called it wrong* .. "I think" ...

 

[Dave Ireland]

Dangermeister

This is a pic of KA, taken on a shortish par 4, but it was a low index hole. Reason for the low index became apparent. The green was tear dropped shaped with the river biting in front, right and back. The drop into the water behind KA is about the same height as the drop from the bridge in the background. Ladies and germs he did it all without the aid of a safety net. Tho in saying that, I had him pose like that for 15 mins or so, just in case there was something worth posting into "The world's funniest home movies", don't knock it .. money is money ... would've paid for the dry cleaning bill too ... and there's you lot thinking I'm heartless ..