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Who said golf...

bdcrowe

ST Homeland Security
Aug 30, 2004
2,207
276
isn't a contact sport?

I'm playing the Bear Trace in Chattanooga yesterday and have a pretty good round going. I'm 5 over after 11 with most of the 5 over in the first few holes and getting better as the round progresses. On the 12th, my ball goes slightly left and long. It is resting in fairly deep rough, but there is a thick, huge, softball-sized clump of grass ditectly behind and against my ball. I take out the lob wedge and figure I'll power-blast through the hell-grass and get on in 3. I power into the grass, my club and arms immediately stop dead in the clump of grass while my body continues with the swing. I pull a muscle in my rib cage and drop to my knees. Finish the hole with a grimace.

Every full swing after that has either (a) sharp pain just before impact, or (b) fear of sharp pain just before impact. The 13th and 14th saw me at 8 over for those 2 holes. I ended up with a 17 over for the day. Yep guys, that's 12 over in 6 holes. I'm too manly to blame it on injury and too humilated with these 6 holes to face my playing partners. I'm getting too old when golf hurts.
 

IrishGolfer

Fac ut gaudeam
Supporting Member
Sep 1, 2004
6,545
4,979
bdcrowe said:
isn't a contact sport?

I'm playing the Bear Trace in Chattanooga yesterday and have a pretty good round going. I'm 5 over after 11 with most of the 5 over in the first few holes and getting better as the round progresses. On the 12th, my ball goes slightly left and long. It is resting in fairly deep rough, but there is a thick, huge, softball-sized clump of grass ditectly behind and against my ball. I take out the lob wedge and figure I'll power-blast through the hell-grass and get on in 3. I power into the grass, my club and arms immediately stop dead in the clump of grass while my body continues with the swing. I pull a muscle in my rib cage and drop to my knees. Finish the hole with a grimace.

Every full swing after that has either (a) sharp pain just before impact, or (b) fear of sharp pain just before impact. The 13th and 14th saw me at 8 over for those 2 holes. I ended up with a 17 over for the day. Yep guys, that's 12 over in 6 holes. I'm too manly to blame it on injury and too humilated with these 6 holes to face my playing partners. I'm getting too old when golf hurts.

Sounds painful dude. Happens to us all at some point. The "fear" of sharp pain would be enough to throw most mortals.

Blokes are good at comparing pain. So in a typical bloke manner, I will try and surpass your pain. Not only did I miss out playing in a competition yesterday (had to practice and then play a few holes on my own, oh, the humiliation of it!!) I spent last night trying to hack tiles off our bathroom wall. 4 hours of pain. And now I have 2 blisters the size of donoughts on my poor hands. They say urine is supposed to be a relief, so I'm off to piss on my hands.

You should try it too. At least it will take your mind off the pain. My next thread will be entitled "Urine and golf, a good mix?"
 
OP
bdcrowe

bdcrowe

ST Homeland Security
Aug 30, 2004
2,207
276
  • Thread Starter
  • Thread starter
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I would be a very special person indeed if I could pee on my ribs and lower back, but I'll try anything once. I'll let you know if it works...
 

IrishGolfer

Fac ut gaudeam
Supporting Member
Sep 1, 2004
6,545
4,979
bdcrowe said:
I would be a very special person indeed if I could pee on my ribs and lower back, but I'll try anything once. I'll let you know if it works...

Why do you think they invented a hosepipe? Well, it wasn't for washing your car, I'll tell you that. If you can't hit the affected areas externally try the "heal from within" alternative. They say it's good for you, very calming.

LOL remember the Highway Patrol guy in Dumb and Dumber!!! "You guys been sucking back on some of old Granddads cough medicine"!
 

DaveE

The golfer fka ST Champ
Aug 31, 2004
3,986
3
IrishGolfer said:
Sounds painful dude. Happens to us all at some point. The "fear" of sharp pain would be enough to throw most mortals.

Blokes are good at comparing pain. So in a typical bloke manner, I will try and surpass your pain. Not only did I miss out playing in a competition yesterday (had to practice and then play a few holes on my own, oh, the humiliation of it!!) I spent last night trying to hack tiles off our bathroom wall. 4 hours of pain. And now I have 2 blisters the size of donoughts on my poor hands. They say urine is supposed to be a relief, so I'm off to piss on my hands.

You should try it too. At least it will take your mind off the pain. My next thread will be entitled "Urine and golf, a good mix?"

Irish;
You got a compressor? If you do, go to your local auto parts or hardware strore and by an air chisel. They're cheap and make easy work of tile removal.

Crowe;
Crappy way to see a good round go bad. Let me know how the peeing goes so I'll know if I need to figure out how to piss on my lower back. :p
 

Rockford35

Shark skin shoes
Staff member
Admin
Aug 30, 2004
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DaveE said:
Let me know how the peeing goes so I'll know if I need to figure out how to piss on my lower back. :p


Dave, if you ever need someone to piss on your back, i'm first in line! :D

Sucks about the round, Crowe. Must be the EVO's. ;)

I broke my collarbone about 5 years ago and every once in a while I get a stinger there after a shot like the one your described. It usually takes me about 2 weeks to get back into gam shape.....

Take care. If the wife needs a perscription for bedrest and TV, i'll write one up for you.... ;)

R35
 

IrishGolfer

Fac ut gaudeam
Supporting Member
Sep 1, 2004
6,545
4,979
DaveE said:
Irish;
You got a compressor? If you do, go to your local auto parts or hardware strore and by an air chisel. They're cheap and make easy work of tile removal.

Dave

Don't you know that these are the "hands that built America"! Us Irish are used to pain. You and your fancy "high faluttin" compressors. A bit of spit and elbow grease is all it takes (according to my Mrs.).

And so my misery continues tonight, and tomorrow ad nauseum.
 

DaveE

The golfer fka ST Champ
Aug 31, 2004
3,986
3
IrishGolfer said:
DaveE said:
Irish;
You got a compressor? If you do, go to your local auto parts or hardware strore and by an air chisel. They're cheap and make easy work of tile removal.

Dave

Don't you know that these are the "hands that built America"! Us Irish are used to pain. You and your fancy "high faluttin" compressors. A bit of spit and elbow grease is all it takes (according to my Mrs.).

And so my misery continues tonight, and tomorrow ad nauseum.

I understand she wants you to suffer and probably rightly so. But, she also want the job finished and I promise it will get done in way less than half the time. You can always grimmace to let her think you are in pain while the tiles fly off the wall.

Personally, I'm always looking for an excuse to buy new power tools. Club ho, tool ho, once a ho always a ho. :p
 

Loop

Well-Known Member
Aug 27, 2004
1,418
3
Try rubbing you ribs with brown cream, it is quite soothing. The only problem is the smell, as it may be bothersome for people around you.

Last season, had a neck muscle spasm. Every rotational movement were a pure grinning pleasure. Just remember to warm up before play, it'll save you a month of trouble...
 

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