- Joined
- Sep 1, 2004
- Messages
- 6,548
- Reaction score
- 4,985
- Points
- 363
So I took my life in my hands yesterday and went ice-skating with the family. My 6 year old watched some celebrity ice show on TV and ever since has pestered me to take him to the ice rink. Ice Skating is not exactly popular in Ireland. In fact Northern Ireland is blessed with only one rink. So off we went on a 140 mile round trip to Dundonald Ice Bowl to do the Bank Holiday Skate Gig.
I think I was skating once in my life before, with a few trips to the Roller Disco in the early 80s so I wasn’t exactly an expert, but then again, judging by the amount of “Dad Spills” neither was anyone else. It’s kinda funny watching grown men behave like “chickens on drugs” and I saw a few horrific crashes as overweight guys felt the full force of 20 years of overeating. OCCCHHH!
The whole experience was not exactly fun for me. I had flashes and premonitions of broken wrists, arms, neck etc. and spent my time trying to work out how to fall “softly”. It even flashed through my mind that I would break a limb and be out for the rest of the golf season. Both my wrists have been through the wars so it wouldn’t take much for me to be on the golfing sidelines.
Meantime the Christopher Dean wannabe attached to my right arm was intent on trying to do spins and jumps with no skating experience, so every time he went down I felt that my arm was being pulled from my socket.
But I have to tell you I was magnificent. While Dads were falling round me like “sacks of spuds” I managed to stay up the whole time. Not once did my body grace the cold and wet feel of the ice. Despite my enthusiastic 6 year old’s best attempts to pull me down I was like a rock.
In fact I started to quite enjoy it doing laps and building up some speed towards the end. Don’t get me wrong, I almost lost it several times, but my skating angel managed to keep me upright. I don’t think I would have got many marks for my Interpretation of the music but I got the T-Shirt at the end to say “I survived”.
Don’t think I’ll be back soon, and judging by the bruising to my 6 year old’s backside, I don’t think he’ll be rushing to go back either.
This must be hilarious for all you Canucks who were born wearing skates.
I think I was skating once in my life before, with a few trips to the Roller Disco in the early 80s so I wasn’t exactly an expert, but then again, judging by the amount of “Dad Spills” neither was anyone else. It’s kinda funny watching grown men behave like “chickens on drugs” and I saw a few horrific crashes as overweight guys felt the full force of 20 years of overeating. OCCCHHH!
The whole experience was not exactly fun for me. I had flashes and premonitions of broken wrists, arms, neck etc. and spent my time trying to work out how to fall “softly”. It even flashed through my mind that I would break a limb and be out for the rest of the golf season. Both my wrists have been through the wars so it wouldn’t take much for me to be on the golfing sidelines.
Meantime the Christopher Dean wannabe attached to my right arm was intent on trying to do spins and jumps with no skating experience, so every time he went down I felt that my arm was being pulled from my socket.
But I have to tell you I was magnificent. While Dads were falling round me like “sacks of spuds” I managed to stay up the whole time. Not once did my body grace the cold and wet feel of the ice. Despite my enthusiastic 6 year old’s best attempts to pull me down I was like a rock.
In fact I started to quite enjoy it doing laps and building up some speed towards the end. Don’t get me wrong, I almost lost it several times, but my skating angel managed to keep me upright. I don’t think I would have got many marks for my Interpretation of the music but I got the T-Shirt at the end to say “I survived”.
Don’t think I’ll be back soon, and judging by the bruising to my 6 year old’s backside, I don’t think he’ll be rushing to go back either.
This must be hilarious for all you Canucks who were born wearing skates.